Families

Mar. 3rd, 2014 04:41 pm
tabi_no_sora: (Default)
[personal profile] tabi_no_sora
OH WHY have I spent half of today arguing with my father via email about my family+my-brother's-girlfriend-whom-I-have-met-twice's hypothetical visit to Canada in August?*

Families. They are complicated. I normally have a fairly smooth relationship with mine, and I still have the occasional moment when I just never want to see any of them again, ever.

TORONTO: NOT FAR ENOUGH AWAY IN MY OPINION.


*If you were 23 and you had a girlfriend, would you invite yourself and said girlfriend on a holiday that your parents were going on? Surely you would prefer to spend your holiday time on holiday by yourself, with girlfriend and no parents? Or is that just me?
What if the parental holiday was a transatlantic trip especially to visit your elder sister, who has met your girlfriend briefly twice, and who you are pretty convinced doesn't like your girlfriend?** Seriously, does ANYBODY EXCEPT ME think this is a bad idea for all concerned?

...no? Okay, just me, then. Fine. I'm sure we'll all have a lovely time.


**I pretend! But he knows me well enough to know my taste in people, and also to know how I behave when I am trying my best to be nice to people I don't like.

Date: 2014-03-04 09:02 am (UTC)
antisoppist: (Boat)
From: [personal profile] antisoppist
I think there is a thing where family members/friends moving to some once-in-a-lifetime exotic* holiday destination are seen as an ideal opportunity/excuse for other family members/friends to have a once-in-a-lifetime exotic holiday to it even if their family relationship/friendship is not that close. When my cousin moved to New Zealand, my mother was instantly determined to go and visit her because wow New Zealand and she'd never had a chance to go before. And then my grandmother decided she was going too and mum was a bit cross about that and in the end my sister went as well to give mum a break from looking after grandma. Afterwards they are all really glad they went and that grandma had that last marvellous holiday in her eighties but at the time it felt a bit like "cousin is in New Zealand so we are all instantly going to New Zealand" and I have no idea what cousin thought about it although my mum has always got on well with her so it isn't completely peculiar.

So perhaps it is more about Canada than about visiting you. Can you produce great lists of things they might want to do and visit on their own once they arrive? Including the odd night staying somewhere else - "while you're in Canada, you should really go and stay in this amazing place hundreds of miles away...!"

*Or not that exotic. Friends who moved to Cornwall are booked up nearly every weekend with everyone they have ever known inviting themselves to stay. They have issued a 3 nights only rule to avoid going nuts and have bought a visitors' book.

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